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Previously on "Weeds"...
2
00:00:06,882 --> 00:00:09,116
Shane, what the fuck happened
at the party?
3
00:00:09,151 --> 00:00:11,252
I killed Pilar with
a croquet mallet by the pool.
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00:00:11,286 --> 00:00:13,621
She was gonna kill us,
so I popped the bitch.
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00:00:16,291 --> 00:00:19,293
My child murdered someone.
I have to leave town now.
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00:00:19,327 --> 00:00:21,962
You can come if you want.
I'd like you to come.
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00:00:21,997 --> 00:00:23,464
No, I want to stay here
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00:00:23,498 --> 00:00:25,566
and start my life
with this woman I love.
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00:00:25,600 --> 00:00:27,601
Well, that's not really
an option for you anymore, Andy.
10
00:00:27,636 --> 00:00:29,270
We're not gonna work out.
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00:00:29,304 --> 00:00:32,073
So, what's
the destination, boss?
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North.
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Time for Uncle Andy's guide
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00:00:35,243 --> 00:00:36,877
to living off the grid.
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00:00:36,912 --> 00:00:38,712
Step one...
kill your old identity.
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00:00:38,747 --> 00:00:41,382
Step two...
establishing new identities.
17
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I'll be Mike.
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Shawn.
Nathalie.
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00:00:44,553 --> 00:00:47,221
I'll be "Randy Newman."
Ha! N-e-w-m-a-n.
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Heritage... muddy.
Jew? Ah, can't tell.
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The Newmans will succeed
where the Botwins failed.
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00:00:52,894 --> 00:00:55,563
They will find jobs,
have hobbies.
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They will live a normal life.
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Go get her.
Get my son.
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Sync by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
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It was about four months ago,
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and, uh, Andy was there
for the birth, of course.
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And Esteban arrived later.
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I pissed off Andy
like you wouldn't believe.
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But I guess he's happy now.
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He took off after her
like she was made of shit
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00:01:29,197 --> 00:01:31,832
and he was king of the flies.
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I had just been held hostage,
and my fiancé was leaving me.
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00:01:37,572 --> 00:01:39,840
About Nancy's travel plans.
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Far away, I hope.
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In my minivan.
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In my minivan.
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[ Crying ]
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Protesters: [ chanting ]
What do we want? Money!
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00:01:54,089 --> 00:01:55,823
When do we want it?
Now!
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00:01:55,857 --> 00:01:57,858
What do we want?
Money!
42
00:01:57,893 --> 00:01:59,326
When do we want it?
Now!
43
00:01:59,361 --> 00:02:01,629
What do we want?
Money!
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00:02:05,063 --> 00:02:06,964
Andy: This is
a real dilemma, Nance.
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00:02:06,998 --> 00:02:08,065
On the one hand...
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00:02:08,099 --> 00:02:09,233
We want money.
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00:02:09,267 --> 00:02:10,868
Well, on the other...
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00:02:10,902 --> 00:02:12,903
We want it now?
"Need," actually.
49
00:02:12,938 --> 00:02:16,140
We have exactly $793
between us.
50
00:02:16,174 --> 00:02:17,575
I don't see the dilemma.
51
00:02:17,609 --> 00:02:20,144
What do we want?
Money!
52
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Crossing a picket line
is against everything
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Andy Botwin's ever stood for.
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What's broke-ass Randy Newman's
take on it?
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[ Chanting continues ]
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Fuck 'em.
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Stay strong.
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00:02:31,890 --> 00:02:33,490
Protesters:
What do we want? Money!
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00:02:33,525 --> 00:02:35,893
Woman:
Union busters! Scabs!
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Well, you all seem to have
quite a lot of experience
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00:02:37,963 --> 00:02:39,430
in the hospitality industry.
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We are very passionate about...
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[ Chuckling ] Hospitality.
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Any problem
crossing the picket line?
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[ Chuckling ]
Oh, they're all bark. No bite.
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00:02:48,673 --> 00:02:50,074
Morally, I mean.
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00:02:50,108 --> 00:02:53,777
Oh, we sympathize
with both sides.
68
00:02:53,812 --> 00:02:56,614
Yeah. Well,
only one side is right. Okay?
69
00:02:56,648 --> 00:02:58,248
Those are good people
out there,
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00:02:58,283 --> 00:02:59,850
and I'd be with them
if I could.
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00:02:59,884 --> 00:03:01,418
But I got to pay for rink time.
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00:03:02,854 --> 00:03:04,588
Uh, my youngest
is an ice dancer.
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00:03:04,623 --> 00:03:07,191
Hmm. Oh!
Russia, 2014.
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00:03:07,225 --> 00:03:08,492
Noel Kruszewski.
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00:03:08,526 --> 00:03:09,593
Remember that name.
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00:03:09,628 --> 00:03:10,828
Oh. Noel Kruszewski.
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Oh.
That is some outfit.
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He's not gay.
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I'm sure he's not.
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Yeah.
Well, he might be gay.
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00:03:17,685 --> 00:03:19,386
That's okay, too.
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00:03:19,420 --> 00:03:21,421
So, I'm a great
problem solver.
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00:03:21,456 --> 00:03:23,290
I manage people really well.
84
00:03:23,324 --> 00:03:24,958
And Randy here...
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00:03:24,993 --> 00:03:26,760
I don't typically
toot my own horn,
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00:03:26,794 --> 00:03:29,363
but I do have
extensive culinary training.
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I am great behind the bar.
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Quick with the bottle,
short with the pour.
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Well, that all sounds
quite impressive.
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[ Chuckles ]
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00:03:37,939 --> 00:03:40,073
Dishwasher. Bellhop. Maid.
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00:03:45,947 --> 00:03:47,347
Nancy: This is good.
93
00:03:47,382 --> 00:03:48,548
It's grounding.
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00:03:48,583 --> 00:03:50,851
It's a...A seedling
95
00:03:50,885 --> 00:03:53,320
from which we will branch out
and flourish.
96
00:03:53,354 --> 00:03:56,890
The normal Newmans
from Normaltown?
97
00:03:56,924 --> 00:03:59,192
And you really believe
we can keep this up
98
00:03:59,227 --> 00:04:00,994
for any serious length of time?
99
00:04:01,029 --> 00:04:03,163
This is who we are now.
100
00:04:03,197 --> 00:04:04,631
This is us.
101
00:04:06,601 --> 00:04:08,902
What if you'd have gotten
a real job after dad died
102
00:04:08,936 --> 00:04:10,837
and we could have skipped
all this shit?
103
00:04:10,872 --> 00:04:12,906
We would have
had to sell the house.
104
00:04:12,940 --> 00:04:15,108
Move to a very different
zip code.
105
00:04:15,143 --> 00:04:18,111
You and Shane would have gone
to even lousier public schools.
106
00:04:18,146 --> 00:04:19,446
Doesn't sound so bad.
107
00:04:21,249 --> 00:04:23,383
You probably still
would have knocked up a girl.
108
00:04:23,418 --> 00:04:25,685
Maybe this one would have
been blind instead of deaf,
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00:04:25,720 --> 00:04:27,454
or missing a limb.
110
00:04:27,488 --> 00:04:29,423
You would have struggled
with your grades,
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00:04:29,457 --> 00:04:33,360
smoked weed, dropped out,
gotten your G.E.D.
112
00:04:33,394 --> 00:04:35,295
Your brother...
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Still would have had
rage issues.
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He would have lost his virginity
to a skanky girl
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or a skanky-girl duo.
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He would have grown
increasingly alienated,
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ended up stabbing the mailman
118
00:04:46,974 --> 00:04:48,542
or my manager at the gap.
119
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We would have been
in the exact same spot
120
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we're in right now.
121
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[ Baby coos ]
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00:04:52,980 --> 00:04:54,981
Shane.
123
00:04:55,016 --> 00:04:57,317
If mom would have worked at the
gap instead of selling drugs,
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you think you still
would have killed somebody?
125
00:05:01,823 --> 00:05:03,557
Probably.
126
00:05:08,830 --> 00:05:10,931
[ Horn honking ]
127
00:05:10,965 --> 00:05:13,133
[ Woman shouting ]
128
00:05:13,167 --> 00:05:15,035
Andy: Oh, boy.
[ clears throat ]
129
00:05:15,069 --> 00:05:17,604
I think your mom has now
awakened all the hookers.
130
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Okay.
131
00:05:18,739 --> 00:05:20,774
Uh, hopefully,
he should sleep soon.
132
00:05:20,808 --> 00:05:22,742
There's four bottles
in the fridge.
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00:05:22,777 --> 00:05:24,644
Changing stuff
is on the dresser.
134
00:05:24,679 --> 00:05:26,813
Remember to cream his butt
so he doesn't get a rash.
135
00:05:26,848 --> 00:05:28,748
And, uh, you got to burp him
every time you feed him.
136
00:05:28,783 --> 00:05:30,517
Your mom's gonna call
in a couple hours.
137
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She says don't leave the room.
138
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Did you really just say
"cream his butt"?
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I did.
140
00:05:34,889 --> 00:05:36,189
Mike! Time to go.
141
00:05:36,224 --> 00:05:38,992
You really think
it's a good idea?
142
00:05:39,026 --> 00:05:40,627
Leaving pebbles
with bamm-bamm?
143
00:05:40,661 --> 00:05:42,863
No, but we can't afford
childcare,
144
00:05:42,897 --> 00:05:45,966
so we have to take
this small leap of faith.
145
00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:48,068
I'm encouraged, because so far,
146
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the baby's never tried
to have us all killed.
147
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[ Chortles ]
148
00:05:53,241 --> 00:05:54,474
Nice hat.
149
00:05:54,509 --> 00:05:55,842
Let's practice.
150
00:05:55,877 --> 00:05:57,210
I'll say "ding" and you hop.
151
00:05:57,245 --> 00:05:58,545
Ding!
Get me the remote.
152
00:06:05,486 --> 00:06:06,720
Shit!
153
00:06:06,754 --> 00:06:08,588
He just took the remote, Stevie!
We're screwed!
154
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[ Sighs ]
155
00:06:11,359 --> 00:06:12,792
Hey, fuck this place.
Let's roll.
156
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[ Elevator bell dings ]
157
00:06:17,165 --> 00:06:18,431
[ Thud ]
158
00:06:33,414 --> 00:06:36,049
Housekeeping!
159
00:06:40,454 --> 00:06:41,655
Hey.
160
00:06:41,689 --> 00:06:43,356
Hi.
161
00:06:43,391 --> 00:06:44,724
What's going on?
162
00:06:44,759 --> 00:06:46,793
I feel like
we're in a reality show.
163
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Who's getting chopped?
164
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Uh, you the new dishwasher?
165
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And... Randy. Randy.
166
00:06:54,235 --> 00:06:56,703
Not Ayn Rand-y. Couldn't
get through "Atlas Shrugged."
167
00:06:56,737 --> 00:06:58,972
You start work
at 11:00.
168
00:06:59,006 --> 00:07:00,240
Yeah.
169
00:07:00,274 --> 00:07:02,242
Which means you need
to be here before 11:00
170
00:07:02,276 --> 00:07:03,977
so you can be ready
for inspection.
171
00:07:04,011 --> 00:07:05,478
"Inspection."
172
00:07:05,513 --> 00:07:07,013
[ German accent ] Are we ready?
173
00:07:07,048 --> 00:07:10,317
Together:
Yes, chef Wagner.
174
00:07:14,255 --> 00:07:15,522
Morning, chef.
175
00:07:15,556 --> 00:07:16,690
Randy Newman.
176
00:07:16,724 --> 00:07:18,225
I'm a chef myself, you know.
177
00:07:18,259 --> 00:07:19,626
So if there's anything I can do
178
00:07:19,660 --> 00:07:21,361
to help spark up the menu,
please let me know.
179
00:07:21,395 --> 00:07:24,531
I noticed that you're still
serving things in bread bowls.
180
00:07:24,565 --> 00:07:26,032
That is so '80s.
181
00:07:26,067 --> 00:07:28,101
So, you're trying
to be retro, yeah?
182
00:07:28,135 --> 00:07:29,102
What are you?
183
00:07:30,338 --> 00:07:32,739
Bit of an open-ended
question there.
184
00:07:32,773 --> 00:07:35,508
Uh, astrologically,
I'm a Libra.
185
00:07:35,543 --> 00:07:38,411
Scales...
hence I'm idealistic...
186
00:07:38,446 --> 00:07:40,480
And romantic...
But also a tad impatient.
187
00:07:40,514 --> 00:07:42,782
He's the dishwasher.
188
00:07:42,817 --> 00:07:44,451
Well, yeah, among other things,
189
00:07:44,485 --> 00:07:46,086
but temporarily.
190
00:07:46,120 --> 00:07:48,255
Then I suggest
you do some dishes.
191
00:07:48,289 --> 00:07:49,689
There aren't any to wash yet.
192
00:07:49,724 --> 00:07:51,591
Let's talk food!
193
00:07:54,962 --> 00:07:57,497
Oh, I get it... hazing.
Okay.
194
00:08:06,107 --> 00:08:10,577
♪ It's a cry-cry-crying shame ♪
195
00:08:10,611 --> 00:08:15,048
♪ that no one ever told her ♪
196
00:08:15,082 --> 00:08:21,054
♪ not if you always
thank and plea ♪
197
00:08:21,088 --> 00:08:25,525
♪ and won't touch more
than you need ♪
198
00:08:25,559 --> 00:08:31,364
♪ and you may never
really know ♪
199
00:08:31,399 --> 00:08:35,602
♪ the joy of letting go ♪
200
00:08:35,636 --> 00:08:40,307
[ yodeling ]
201
00:08:51,285 --> 00:08:52,585
[ Sighs ]
202
00:08:55,389 --> 00:08:57,691
[ Grunting ]
203
00:08:57,725 --> 00:09:00,026
And where would you like it,
Mr. Duvane?
204
00:09:00,061 --> 00:09:01,961
Uh, you may set it
right on the bed.
205
00:09:01,996 --> 00:09:03,963
Thank you.
206
00:09:03,998 --> 00:09:06,366
And call me "Paul."
207
00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:08,134
Beautiful room!
208
00:09:08,169 --> 00:09:10,036
Yeah. It's nice.
209
00:09:10,071 --> 00:09:11,304
Yeah.
210
00:09:11,339 --> 00:09:13,473
Fancy TV and everything.
211
00:09:13,507 --> 00:09:15,842
Although
I-I don't really watch TV.
212
00:09:15,876 --> 00:09:17,577
I like books.
213
00:09:17,611 --> 00:09:19,879
Is there gonna be anything else,
Mr. Duvane?
214
00:09:19,914 --> 00:09:20,780
Hmm?
215
00:09:20,815 --> 00:09:22,449
Oh, of course.
I'm so sorry.
216
00:09:22,483 --> 00:09:23,950
[ Imitates robot ]
217
00:09:23,984 --> 00:09:25,285
[ Robotic voice ]
Recalibrating for manners.
218
00:09:25,319 --> 00:09:26,553
[ Chuckles ]
219
00:09:26,587 --> 00:09:28,288
[ Normal voice ]
You're in need of a reward.
220
00:09:28,322 --> 00:09:29,923
There we go.
221
00:09:29,957 --> 00:09:31,624
Wow.
222
00:09:31,659 --> 00:09:33,360
It's very generous.
Thank you.
223
00:09:33,394 --> 00:09:34,761
Yeah, well, you must be tired.
Heavy bag.
224
00:09:34,795 --> 00:09:36,563
Oh, please...
here. Sit.
225
00:09:36,597 --> 00:09:37,931
Uh, I should really be going.
226
00:09:37,965 --> 00:09:39,232
Oh, no, please.
227
00:09:49,777 --> 00:09:51,378
[ Chuckles ]
228
00:09:58,686 --> 00:10:00,453
[ Sighs ]
229
00:10:00,488 --> 00:10:02,155
Do you like books, Mike?
230
00:10:02,189 --> 00:10:05,091
Yeah. Sure. Books...
they're... they're okay.
231
00:10:05,126 --> 00:10:07,093
"Okay" is
a 60-degree day.
232
00:10:07,128 --> 00:10:08,695
Where's the hot and the cold?
233
00:10:08,729 --> 00:10:10,764
I want you to read to me.
234
00:10:12,166 --> 00:10:13,767
[ Chuckling ]
I'm sorry. What?
235
00:10:13,801 --> 00:10:16,336
You see,
I have plenty of books here,
236
00:10:16,370 --> 00:10:17,837
but they tire my eyes.
237
00:10:17,872 --> 00:10:20,673
And [Sighs]
Don't you think it's fantastic
238
00:10:20,708 --> 00:10:23,710
when you hear stories
in somebody else's voice?
239
00:10:24,945 --> 00:10:27,180
I should get...
Back downstairs.
240
00:10:27,214 --> 00:10:28,882
There was a pregnant woman
coming in...
241
00:10:28,916 --> 00:10:30,183
a family
of preg... pregnant women.
242
00:10:30,217 --> 00:10:31,584
Lots of bags.
243
00:10:31,619 --> 00:10:33,987
Nobody else will tip you
as well as I will.
244
00:10:42,663 --> 00:10:45,532
So I...I just sit here
and read to you?
245
00:10:45,566 --> 00:10:46,966
Yeah. More or less.
246
00:10:47,001 --> 00:10:49,769
What's the..."More"?
247
00:10:49,804 --> 00:10:51,871
Oh. Let's just focus
on the "less."
248
00:10:59,246 --> 00:11:01,047
[ Grunting ]
249
00:11:07,455 --> 00:11:08,688
Oh.
250
00:11:08,722 --> 00:11:11,124
Piece of shit.
251
00:11:11,158 --> 00:11:12,125
God.
252
00:11:12,159 --> 00:11:14,160
[ Straining ]
253
00:11:14,195 --> 00:11:16,496
Yeah, it's really not worth it
to fix it.
254
00:11:16,530 --> 00:11:18,665
You might as well buy a new one.
What do you got?
255
00:11:18,699 --> 00:11:20,767
Well, we exclusively carry
the yippity line here.
256
00:11:20,801 --> 00:11:22,869
We got the yippity sport,
the yippity deluxe...
257
00:11:22,903 --> 00:11:25,472
And our best-seller,
the yippity dragon.
258
00:11:25,506 --> 00:11:26,673
How much is it?
259
00:11:26,707 --> 00:11:28,041
$800.
260
00:11:28,075 --> 00:11:30,477
For a stroller.
That's ridiculous.
261
00:11:30,511 --> 00:11:33,046
What do you have for $100?
262
00:11:33,080 --> 00:11:34,547
I've got
the... the yippity sippity.
263
00:11:34,582 --> 00:11:35,782
That's the cup holder.
264
00:11:35,816 --> 00:11:38,218
A cup holder...
for $100?
265
00:11:38,252 --> 00:11:41,221
Look, I don't make the things.
I just sell them.
266
00:11:41,255 --> 00:11:42,555
Living the dream.
267
00:11:42,590 --> 00:11:43,957
Yeah, look, kid,
I bought my house
268
00:11:43,991 --> 00:11:45,391
at the height of the market,
269
00:11:45,426 --> 00:11:46,793
and now I'm squatting in it.
270
00:11:46,827 --> 00:11:48,528
Add to that my scrabble debts
271
00:11:48,562 --> 00:11:50,997
and my wife wanting...
no, needing... the lap-band,
272
00:11:51,031 --> 00:11:52,632
and I don't have time to dream.
273
00:11:52,666 --> 00:11:54,000
And if you ain't buying,
274
00:11:54,034 --> 00:11:56,569
I'm going back
to my online game.
275
00:12:04,845 --> 00:12:06,045
Oh, God!
276
00:12:06,080 --> 00:12:07,180
I'll come back.
277
00:12:07,214 --> 00:12:08,681
Oh, no. Wait.
She took off.
278
00:12:08,716 --> 00:12:10,917
She said she was late
for her day job.
279
00:12:10,951 --> 00:12:12,785
Are... are there keys
on the desk?
280
00:12:14,288 --> 00:12:15,255
Yeah.
281
00:12:15,289 --> 00:12:16,656
Oh, great.
282
00:12:16,690 --> 00:12:18,358
Please.
[ sighs ]
283
00:12:18,392 --> 00:12:19,425
Thank you.
284
00:12:23,364 --> 00:12:24,564
[ Handcuffs jingle ]
285
00:12:24,598 --> 00:12:26,499
Awkward.
[ chuckles ]
286
00:12:26,534 --> 00:12:29,569
Ohh. Wow.
287
00:12:29,603 --> 00:12:31,504
Did... did you have
an accident?
288
00:12:31,539 --> 00:12:33,006
Oh, no, that's not mine.
289
00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:34,607
Hers?
290
00:12:34,642 --> 00:12:36,075
Yeah.
I got what I paid for.
291
00:12:36,110 --> 00:12:37,510
Uh, could you hurry up, please?
292
00:12:37,545 --> 00:12:39,045
Wait.
Let me get this straight.
293
00:12:39,079 --> 00:12:41,447
So, you invite a hooker
up here,
294
00:12:41,482 --> 00:12:43,116
have her cuff you to the bed,
295
00:12:43,150 --> 00:12:44,717
drink a $20 bottle of evian,
296
00:12:44,752 --> 00:12:46,052
and then pee on you.
297
00:12:46,086 --> 00:12:47,754
Did you at any point
happen to think
298
00:12:47,788 --> 00:12:49,489
who might have to clean it up?
299
00:12:49,523 --> 00:12:52,191
That's your job.
Don't pass judgment on me.
300
00:12:52,226 --> 00:12:54,193
I'm a paying guest!
You're the fucking maid!
301
00:12:54,228 --> 00:12:56,329
Will you hurry with the keys?!
302
00:12:59,833 --> 00:13:01,167
[ Scoffs ]
303
00:13:03,103 --> 00:13:05,271
You're not exactly
in the power position,
304
00:13:05,306 --> 00:13:08,041
so I suggest you be
a little more respectful to me,
305
00:13:08,075 --> 00:13:10,009
the "fucking maid."
306
00:13:10,044 --> 00:13:11,945
I'll leave you
a nice tip, okay?
307
00:13:11,979 --> 00:13:12,879
How much?
308
00:13:12,913 --> 00:13:13,746
20 bucks.
309
00:13:13,781 --> 00:13:14,781
80.
310
00:13:14,815 --> 00:13:16,015
Okay, fine.
311
00:13:19,620 --> 00:13:20,720
[ Sighs ]
312
00:13:20,754 --> 00:13:22,422
She took all your cash...
313
00:13:22,456 --> 00:13:24,991
Phil Lounsberry from Hoboken.
314
00:13:25,025 --> 00:13:26,059
Oh, please.
315
00:13:26,093 --> 00:13:27,627
I'm cold, you know?
316
00:13:27,661 --> 00:13:29,596
At first, I was warm...
317
00:13:29,630 --> 00:13:30,863
Let me tell you what, Phil.
318
00:13:30,898 --> 00:13:32,065
May I call you Phil?
319
00:13:32,099 --> 00:13:33,232
Oh, yeah.
320
00:13:33,267 --> 00:13:35,101
You want your freedom.
I want mine.
321
00:13:35,135 --> 00:13:37,503
I'll leave some sheets for you,
right here.
322
00:13:37,538 --> 00:13:39,472
How about today
you be your own maid?
323
00:13:39,506 --> 00:13:41,341
[ Shivers ] Sound good?
Yeah.
324
00:13:41,375 --> 00:13:42,909
Don't worry about the tip.
325
00:13:42,943 --> 00:13:44,644
[ Door opens ]
326
00:13:54,154 --> 00:13:56,289
I admire your sauce work.
327
00:13:56,323 --> 00:13:58,157
Light, clean, artistic.
328
00:13:58,192 --> 00:13:59,926
I just...
329
00:13:59,960 --> 00:14:01,561
We should work
on a dish together.
330
00:14:01,595 --> 00:14:03,830
Tell me...
where did you train?
331
00:14:03,864 --> 00:14:05,064
Oh, God.
332
00:14:05,099 --> 00:14:07,266
My skills are based
more on experience
333
00:14:07,301 --> 00:14:08,534
than formal training.
334
00:14:08,569 --> 00:14:10,503
Oh, fascinating.
Yeah.
335
00:14:10,537 --> 00:14:12,105
I think that cooking schools
336
00:14:12,139 --> 00:14:13,673
can crush the creative spirit.
337
00:14:13,707 --> 00:14:15,508
My spirit is uncrushed.
[ chuckles ]
338
00:14:15,542 --> 00:14:16,843
Where'd you learn
to cook?
339
00:14:16,877 --> 00:14:18,711
Your mother's vagina.
340
00:14:18,746 --> 00:14:21,080
Really?
Sounds very avant-garde.
341
00:14:21,115 --> 00:14:23,750
Tell me...
why are you speaking to me?
342
00:14:23,784 --> 00:14:27,220
You are a dishwasher
who doesn't wash dishes.
343
00:14:27,254 --> 00:14:30,957
Can you please tell me why
I shouldn't fire you right now?
344
00:14:30,991 --> 00:14:34,093
Uh, 'cause my mother's vagina
taught you how to cook.
345
00:14:34,128 --> 00:14:35,695
Ugh!
346
00:14:35,729 --> 00:14:39,966
You will never again
speak in my kitchen.
347
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:40,967
I know.
348
00:14:41,001 --> 00:14:41,934
Understood?
349
00:14:41,969 --> 00:14:43,302
Yeah.
350
00:14:43,337 --> 00:14:44,504
Ahh. [ sniffs ]
351
00:14:44,538 --> 00:14:46,773
It's all right.
352
00:14:46,807 --> 00:14:49,208
[ Light piano music plays ]
353
00:14:50,911 --> 00:14:52,812
Compliments of the gentleman.
354
00:15:03,691 --> 00:15:06,426
[ Glasses clink ]
355
00:15:06,460 --> 00:15:09,128
Let me guess...
something in computers.
356
00:15:09,163 --> 00:15:10,563
Software?
357
00:15:10,597 --> 00:15:12,198
FBI.
358
00:15:14,168 --> 00:15:17,236
Federal bureau
of interested in you.
359
00:15:17,271 --> 00:15:18,771
Oy.
360
00:15:18,806 --> 00:15:20,573
[ Both laugh ]
361
00:15:20,607 --> 00:15:21,974
I'm sorry.
362
00:15:22,009 --> 00:15:24,010
Telling people I'm in
heating and air-conditioning
363
00:15:24,044 --> 00:15:25,578
isn't exactly an aphrodisiac.
364
00:15:28,449 --> 00:15:30,016
[ Sighs ]
365
00:15:30,050 --> 00:15:31,184
I'm Vince.
366
00:15:31,218 --> 00:15:32,985
Oh. Nathalie.
367
00:15:33,020 --> 00:15:34,687
And what do you do, Nathalie?
368
00:15:34,722 --> 00:15:36,022
[ Inhales sharply ]
369
00:15:36,056 --> 00:15:38,758
What do I do?
Excellent question.
370
00:15:38,792 --> 00:15:40,727
I own my own business.
371
00:15:40,761 --> 00:15:41,961
A dance studio.
372
00:15:41,995 --> 00:15:44,464
Modern dance.
373
00:15:44,498 --> 00:15:47,300
I studied in Paris and...
374
00:15:47,334 --> 00:15:48,868
Paris?
375
00:15:48,902 --> 00:15:51,671
C'est une ville tres jolie.
376
00:15:51,705 --> 00:15:54,607
Oui.
Presque parfaite.
377
00:15:54,641 --> 00:15:55,508
[ Both laugh ]
378
00:15:55,542 --> 00:15:56,509
Where were you?
379
00:15:56,543 --> 00:15:58,244
The neuve arrondisement.
380
00:16:00,848 --> 00:16:02,115
It was great.
381
00:16:02,149 --> 00:16:04,884
It was so great.
382
00:16:04,918 --> 00:16:06,085
Um...
383
00:16:06,120 --> 00:16:07,386
But then New York beckoned
and...
384
00:16:07,421 --> 00:16:08,554
And Seattle?
385
00:16:08,589 --> 00:16:10,356
Yeah.
386
00:16:10,390 --> 00:16:12,191
Mm.
387
00:16:12,226 --> 00:16:13,426
I get restless.
388
00:16:13,460 --> 00:16:15,161
And this opportunity
came along...
389
00:16:15,195 --> 00:16:16,529
My own business.
390
00:16:16,563 --> 00:16:18,631
No one looking
over my shoulder.
391
00:16:18,665 --> 00:16:19,632
You know?
392
00:16:19,666 --> 00:16:21,768
Kids?
Yeah. Uh, what?
393
00:16:21,802 --> 00:16:23,035
Kids?
Uh...No.
394
00:16:23,070 --> 00:16:24,470
Mnh-mnh. No.
395
00:16:24,505 --> 00:16:26,506
Husband?
Boyfriend?
396
00:16:26,540 --> 00:16:28,541
[ Chuckles ]
397
00:16:28,575 --> 00:16:31,778
I have a...A history
398
00:16:31,812 --> 00:16:36,382
of killing anything
that could conceivably work out.
399
00:16:36,416 --> 00:16:38,785
[ Chuckles ]
400
00:16:38,819 --> 00:16:40,787
Well...
401
00:16:40,821 --> 00:16:43,589
Not everything is meant
to have a long shelf life.
402
00:16:43,624 --> 00:16:44,824
Yeah.
403
00:16:44,858 --> 00:16:46,559
You got to pick the fruit
while it's ripe.
404
00:16:46,593 --> 00:16:47,593
I love fruit.
405
00:16:47,628 --> 00:16:48,861
Don:
[ clears throat ]
406
00:16:48,896 --> 00:16:50,196
Unh-unh.
407
00:16:50,230 --> 00:16:51,664
Excuse me, sir.
Don Kruszewski.
408
00:16:51,698 --> 00:16:53,199
Hotel manager.
409
00:16:53,233 --> 00:16:55,268
I just need a quick word
with my employee here. Okay?
410
00:16:55,302 --> 00:16:57,170
Come. Over here.
411
00:16:58,972 --> 00:17:00,306
Okay.
412
00:17:00,340 --> 00:17:02,108
First off, give me that.
Okay?
413
00:17:02,142 --> 00:17:04,610
The wig isn't
fooling anyone, okay?
414
00:17:04,645 --> 00:17:06,145
No staff at the bar.
415
00:17:06,180 --> 00:17:07,780
I don't care if you're off
the clock... look at me.
416
00:17:07,815 --> 00:17:09,115
Go and drink
down the street. Okay?
417
00:17:09,149 --> 00:17:10,449
Second, guess what.
418
00:17:10,484 --> 00:17:12,084
You're not
off the clock yet. Okay?
419
00:17:12,119 --> 00:17:13,719
'Cause one of our valued
regulars, Mr. Lounsberry,
420
00:17:13,754 --> 00:17:15,321
he just called housekeeping
421
00:17:15,355 --> 00:17:16,689
to say that his sheets
had not been changed
422
00:17:16,723 --> 00:17:18,524
and his bed had not been made.
423
00:17:18,559 --> 00:17:21,928
Get up to 612 immediately
and do your job. Huh?
424
00:17:21,962 --> 00:17:23,996
While you still have it.
425
00:17:25,499 --> 00:17:27,533
Hope you're enjoying your stay.
426
00:17:32,673 --> 00:17:33,773
[ Chuckles ]
427
00:17:33,807 --> 00:17:35,374
[ Chuckles lightly ]
428
00:17:50,891 --> 00:17:53,391
"Dear maid, you know I love
paying women for dirty jobs.
429
00:17:54,461 --> 00:17:56,429
Thanks."
430
00:18:13,747 --> 00:18:16,983
He's gonna pay you
to read to him?
431
00:18:17,017 --> 00:18:18,317
Yeah.
432
00:18:18,352 --> 00:18:21,053
I'm supposed to sit in his room
and read to him...
433
00:18:21,088 --> 00:18:22,355
In my underwear.
434
00:18:22,389 --> 00:18:23,356
Oh.
435
00:18:23,390 --> 00:18:24,290
How much?
436
00:18:24,324 --> 00:18:25,791
50 bucks a page.
437
00:18:25,826 --> 00:18:27,593
Oh, not bad!
438
00:18:27,628 --> 00:18:30,930
I once ate Angelo Costello's
boogers for 25 cents.
439
00:18:30,964 --> 00:18:31,964
That's disgusting.
440
00:18:31,999 --> 00:18:33,466
Yeah. Exactly.
441
00:18:33,500 --> 00:18:35,635
Take off your pants.
Go read to this old weirdo.
442
00:18:35,669 --> 00:18:36,969
Wear boxers...
443
00:18:37,004 --> 00:18:38,838
preferably ones
that don't gape.
444
00:18:38,872 --> 00:18:41,908
Read fast,
and, uh, skip paragraphs.
445
00:18:41,942 --> 00:18:43,643
It's not gay, right?
446
00:18:43,677 --> 00:18:45,011
Not if he pays you.
447
00:18:45,045 --> 00:18:47,480
Or if it's underwater.
448
00:18:47,514 --> 00:18:49,015
[ Scoffs ]
449
00:18:49,049 --> 00:18:50,516
This fucking sucks.
450
00:18:50,550 --> 00:18:52,752
You never know.
Might be a terrific book.
451
00:18:52,786 --> 00:18:54,720
You'll get lost
in the narrative.
452
00:18:54,755 --> 00:18:56,856
Oh, boy. I never thought
I'd be washing dishes again.
453
00:18:56,890 --> 00:18:59,992
And who puts trout almondine
on a fucking menu anymore?
454
00:19:00,027 --> 00:19:03,262
It's like he's cooking
for the resistance.
455
00:19:03,297 --> 00:19:04,630
You missed a spot.
456
00:19:04,665 --> 00:19:06,832
Back off, reading rainbow.
[ sighs ]
457
00:19:06,867 --> 00:19:08,501
[ Sighs ]
458
00:19:08,535 --> 00:19:09,869
Hey!
459
00:19:09,903 --> 00:19:11,604
How was your day, Nat?
460
00:19:11,638 --> 00:19:16,108
Uh...I'm no better than
the whore who pees on people.
461
00:19:16,143 --> 00:19:17,510
Oh.
462
00:19:17,544 --> 00:19:20,579
Silas, I think
mommy has a story, too.
463
00:19:24,351 --> 00:19:26,819
I need something
stronger than this.
464
00:19:26,853 --> 00:19:28,487
[ Sighs ]
465
00:19:28,522 --> 00:19:30,623
Hey, buddy.
You're the piano player, right?
466
00:19:30,657 --> 00:19:32,992
I like what you did with
"she's always a woman" in there.
467
00:19:33,026 --> 00:19:34,460
Oh, thank you, man.
Thank you.
468
00:19:34,494 --> 00:19:35,828
Hey, you should hear
469
00:19:35,862 --> 00:19:37,630
my "scenes
from an Italian restaurant."
470
00:19:37,664 --> 00:19:39,432
Looking forward to it.
Yeah.
471
00:19:39,466 --> 00:19:41,434
So, uh...
472
00:19:41,468 --> 00:19:43,769
You know where I could score
some weed around here?
473
00:19:43,804 --> 00:19:45,972
You're shit out of luck
on that one, man.
474
00:19:46,006 --> 00:19:48,641
Nigel the valet used to supply,
but he's on strike.
475
00:19:48,675 --> 00:19:50,876
And the motherfucker
won't sell to nobody
476
00:19:50,911 --> 00:19:52,511
who crosses the picket line.
477
00:19:52,546 --> 00:19:55,247
Thanks. Here.
Have a-a mini-frangelico.
478
00:19:55,282 --> 00:19:57,416
Oh.
479
00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:01,020
No, no, no, no, no.
480
00:20:01,054 --> 00:20:02,388
Nancy: What?
481
00:20:02,422 --> 00:20:04,190
No, no!
482
00:20:04,224 --> 00:20:05,624
I'm not thinking anything.
483
00:20:07,194 --> 00:20:09,128
I'm not. I'm a maid.
I love my job.
484
00:20:09,162 --> 00:20:12,398
I leave things clean
and in order.
485
00:20:12,432 --> 00:20:15,001
We're the Newmans.
486
00:20:15,035 --> 00:20:17,103
It's a whole new life.
487
00:20:21,842 --> 00:20:23,943
Well...I must say,
488
00:20:23,977 --> 00:20:26,879
you look pretty good
for having cancer.
489
00:20:26,913 --> 00:20:29,582
Well, they haven't started
the chemo yet,
490
00:20:29,616 --> 00:20:32,351
so mostly
I'm just kind of...Blah.
491
00:20:32,386 --> 00:20:34,820
But, um, so, to be clear,
492
00:20:34,855 --> 00:20:37,757
you don't dispense
any marijuana here at all?
493
00:20:37,791 --> 00:20:40,593
All we are
is a patient network.
494
00:20:40,627 --> 00:20:42,428
We connect you
with a caregiver...
495
00:20:42,462 --> 00:20:43,696
grower.
496
00:20:43,730 --> 00:20:45,297
And then you make
your own arrangements
497
00:20:45,332 --> 00:20:47,166
for the medicine...
marijuana.
498
00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:48,768
Great.
Let's network.
499
00:20:48,802 --> 00:20:51,570
As soon as I see
your doctor's authorization.
500
00:20:51,605 --> 00:20:54,006
Okay.
[ inhales sharply ]
501
00:20:54,041 --> 00:20:57,443
He's not in the strictest sense
of the word a doctor.
502
00:20:57,477 --> 00:21:00,880
It's a more...
Alternative treatment.
503
00:21:00,914 --> 00:21:02,681
Experimental stuff.
504
00:21:02,716 --> 00:21:04,116
Rules, dear.
505
00:21:04,151 --> 00:21:06,385
If I don't see the consent
signed by a physician
506
00:21:06,420 --> 00:21:08,387
licensed in this state...
507
00:21:08,422 --> 00:21:09,555
[ Gasps ]
508
00:21:09,589 --> 00:21:10,723
There it is.
509
00:21:10,757 --> 00:21:12,224
What?
510
00:21:12,259 --> 00:21:13,993
In your shoes.
511
00:21:16,129 --> 00:21:18,064
Those look like my size.
512
00:21:18,098 --> 00:21:19,765
Are you serious?
513
00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:21,434
I really like shoes.
514
00:21:29,509 --> 00:21:31,510
[ Knock on door ]
515
00:21:33,313 --> 00:21:35,014
[ Chain rattles ]
516
00:21:36,183 --> 00:21:37,550
Hello.
517
00:21:37,584 --> 00:21:39,285
Hi.
Dolores sent me.
518
00:21:39,319 --> 00:21:40,853
Nathalie.
519
00:21:40,887 --> 00:21:42,321
Come in.
520
00:21:46,259 --> 00:21:49,395
Fiona!
The seitan is burning!
521
00:21:50,730 --> 00:21:52,965
And save the oil!
522
00:21:52,999 --> 00:21:54,433
Fuels our van.
523
00:21:54,468 --> 00:21:58,804
Pain in the ass to collect,
but Gaia thanks us.
524
00:21:58,839 --> 00:22:00,906
Go green.
525
00:22:00,941 --> 00:22:02,241
You got cash?
526
00:22:07,147 --> 00:22:09,915
Um...I'm thinking
this is a down payment...
527
00:22:09,950 --> 00:22:12,518
With a little more product...
On consignment?
528
00:22:12,552 --> 00:22:15,754
Here, you get what you pay for.
529
00:22:15,789 --> 00:22:17,590
Please?
530
00:22:17,624 --> 00:22:20,426
As one sister to another?
531
00:22:20,460 --> 00:22:22,328
I'm really good
at moving product.
532
00:22:22,362 --> 00:22:24,163
I could be
your biggest customer.
533
00:22:24,197 --> 00:22:25,564
Hm.
534
00:22:25,599 --> 00:22:28,067
Except you're not my sister,
and we're not wholesalers.
535
00:22:28,101 --> 00:22:30,536
We sell for personal use only.
536
00:22:41,047 --> 00:22:43,215
Oh. You don't keep
your trimmings.
537
00:22:43,250 --> 00:22:45,284
Ah. We used to use them
for compost.
538
00:22:45,318 --> 00:22:47,620
Turns out they are bad
for the beetroot...
539
00:22:47,654 --> 00:22:49,288
Or anyone
who eats the beetroot, so...
540
00:22:49,322 --> 00:22:50,556
[ Footsteps approaching ]
541
00:22:50,590 --> 00:22:51,557
[ Imitating airplane noises ]
542
00:22:55,162 --> 00:22:57,129
[ Chuckling ] Aw.
543
00:22:57,164 --> 00:22:58,764
She's cute.
544
00:22:58,798 --> 00:23:00,032
How old is she?
545
00:23:00,066 --> 00:23:01,333
He is 5.
546
00:23:01,368 --> 00:23:04,670
Kish, you better be shooting
peace rays.
547
00:23:04,704 --> 00:23:06,906
I told you...
we need to cut his hair.
548
00:23:06,940 --> 00:23:08,240
Hey, he's good.
549
00:23:08,275 --> 00:23:09,875
You're gonna make him a fag!
550
00:23:09,910 --> 00:23:11,343
Fiona: Ohh.
551
00:23:11,378 --> 00:23:13,212
Nancy: Boys can be
really violent.
552
00:23:13,246 --> 00:23:15,047
It's all
kill, kill...Kill.
553
00:23:15,081 --> 00:23:16,215
Kish...
554
00:23:16,249 --> 00:23:18,350
Go into
the contemplation corner.
555
00:23:18,385 --> 00:23:20,753
[ Stomping ]
556
00:23:20,787 --> 00:23:22,621
Fiona:
[ chuckling ] Okay.
557
00:23:22,656 --> 00:23:25,357
So, your trimmings, you just...
you throw them away?
558
00:23:25,392 --> 00:23:27,193
Well, if we ever
get our certificate
559
00:23:27,227 --> 00:23:28,794
from the health department,
560
00:23:28,828 --> 00:23:30,529
we are thinking
of making edibles.
561
00:23:30,564 --> 00:23:33,365
Uh, health department...
notorious feet-draggers.
562
00:23:33,400 --> 00:23:35,167
Could take years.
563
00:23:35,202 --> 00:23:36,569
I'll take them.
564
00:23:36,603 --> 00:23:39,238
Doesn't mean
we're giving them away.
565
00:23:39,272 --> 00:23:42,308
I'm thinking $100
buys me a lot of trimmings.
566
00:23:42,342 --> 00:23:43,342
[ Sighs ]
567
00:23:45,545 --> 00:23:47,112
[ Slurps ]
568
00:23:50,350 --> 00:23:52,251
[ Baby coos ]
569
00:23:52,285 --> 00:23:53,919
Yippity-ki-yay, motherfucker.
570
00:23:55,488 --> 00:23:59,291
♪ I'm happy as can be ♪
571
00:23:59,326 --> 00:24:01,961
♪ so happy being me ♪
572
00:24:04,564 --> 00:24:08,200
♪ everything is going my way ♪
573
00:24:08,235 --> 00:24:11,203
♪ so listen to me say ♪
574
00:24:11,238 --> 00:24:12,504
♪ I'm happy as can be ♪
575
00:24:16,309 --> 00:24:18,644
♪ the sun is shining
in the sky ♪
576
00:24:21,014 --> 00:24:22,848
♪ I eat a piece of apple pie ♪
577
00:24:24,985 --> 00:24:28,754
♪ take my hand
and walk with me ♪
578
00:24:28,788 --> 00:24:32,424
♪ there's so much beauty
here to see ♪
579
00:24:32,459 --> 00:24:34,393
♪ shining ♪
580
00:24:37,097 --> 00:24:38,631
[ rattling ]
581
00:24:38,665 --> 00:24:41,967
Silas: "If you want to see
the inside of the spaceship,
582
00:24:42,002 --> 00:24:44,036
"go to page 64.
583
00:24:44,070 --> 00:24:46,305
"If you decide
to stay in the forest,
584
00:24:46,339 --> 00:24:48,474
go to...Page 114."
585
00:24:48,508 --> 00:24:50,042
Go inside.
Go inside.
586
00:24:54,681 --> 00:24:58,617
"Your move has paid off.
They welcome you in for a meal.
587
00:24:58,652 --> 00:25:00,286
You never die."
588
00:25:00,320 --> 00:25:01,320
I never what?
589
00:25:01,354 --> 00:25:05,291
♪ I'm happy as can be ♪
590
00:25:05,325 --> 00:25:08,193
♪ happy being me ♪
591
00:25:15,802 --> 00:25:18,904
I thought the Newmans
were doing things differently.
592
00:25:18,938 --> 00:25:19,738
We are.
593
00:25:21,041 --> 00:25:22,841
We're making hash.
594
00:25:22,876 --> 00:25:24,610
So much for normal.
595
00:25:24,644 --> 00:25:27,313
This is our normal.
596
00:25:27,347 --> 00:25:28,647
♪ I'm so ♪
597
00:25:28,682 --> 00:25:31,417
♪ happy ♪
598
00:25:31,451 --> 00:25:32,651
♪ I'm so ♪
599
00:25:32,686 --> 00:25:35,421
♪ happy ♪
600
00:25:35,455 --> 00:25:36,622
♪ I'm so ♪
601
00:25:36,656 --> 00:25:39,692
♪ happy ♪
602
00:25:42,962 --> 00:25:45,030
Damn.
603
00:25:45,065 --> 00:25:48,667
How come I'm never invited
to these big parties?
604
00:25:48,702 --> 00:25:52,338
Hey, you guys better not
have had any strippers here!
605
00:25:52,372 --> 00:25:54,973
Jesus Christ.
606
00:25:55,008 --> 00:25:56,275
Andy?!
607
00:25:56,309 --> 00:25:58,410
Silas?!
608
00:25:58,445 --> 00:26:01,246
Creepy downer?
609
00:26:01,281 --> 00:26:03,015
Hello?
610
00:26:04,317 --> 00:26:06,018
[ Gun cocks ]
611
00:26:10,857 --> 00:26:13,092
Guess you guys weren't invited,
either, huh?
612
00:26:14,861 --> 00:26:17,328
Sync by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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