1 00:02:18,827 --> 00:02:19,903 Nancy? 2 00:02:22,168 --> 00:02:23,413 Just a minute! 3 00:02:34,046 --> 00:02:35,963 God! You're beautiful. 4 00:02:36,388 --> 00:02:37,510 Come here. 5 00:02:39,928 --> 00:02:40,841 Mom? 6 00:02:43,345 --> 00:02:44,433 Mom? 7 00:03:15,346 --> 00:03:16,593 Checking for monsters? 8 00:03:16,785 --> 00:03:18,552 What? Uh... Oh! 9 00:03:18,848 --> 00:03:23,843 No, I can't find my shoe. Uh, sandal. It's a sandal. 10 00:03:23,977 --> 00:03:26,352 So, I'm guessing no breakfast. 11 00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:29,607 No, I'm not really a breakfast person. 12 00:03:29,722 --> 00:03:32,972 I like to have coffee in the morning but after that I'm good till 13 00:03:32,986 --> 00:03:37,445 lunch usually. Sometimes I have a bagel around... 10:30. 14 00:03:37,527 --> 00:03:40,363 - I'll make you some coffee. - Uh, no, I should go home. 15 00:03:40,448 --> 00:03:44,531 Ah ah! Found it. 16 00:03:45,285 --> 00:03:47,621 You have big feet. 17 00:03:48,126 --> 00:03:51,163 Why do you have a gun in your dresser? 18 00:03:51,298 --> 00:03:52,331 Were you snooping? 19 00:03:52,506 --> 00:03:55,713 My feet used to be smaller but I went up a size with each kid. 20 00:03:55,838 --> 00:03:57,423 It's just sitting there... 21 00:03:57,557 --> 00:03:58,462 in your dresser. 22 00:03:58,597 --> 00:04:00,883 I saw it when I went to pee. 23 00:04:03,057 --> 00:04:05,391 I like your big feet. 24 00:04:07,605 --> 00:04:12,231 They're not like Fred Flinstone feet. They're just... 25 00:04:12,397 --> 00:04:14,643 long. Uh... 26 00:04:15,816 --> 00:04:18,613 What do you do exactly... 27 00:04:18,775 --> 00:04:19,941 for a living? 28 00:04:20,157 --> 00:04:23,742 - I'm a DEA agent. - You never said anything. 29 00:04:23,865 --> 00:04:27,702 You never asked. And it's not really a job that you advertise. 30 00:04:27,827 --> 00:04:31,703 - I need to go home. - No, no, no. Come on! Wait! 31 00:04:31,917 --> 00:04:34,371 - Wait a second! - Oh, God! You're naked. 32 00:04:34,508 --> 00:04:36,180 So were you until a few minutes ago. 33 00:04:36,217 --> 00:04:38,610 But now it's day time and I'm all dressed and... 34 00:04:38,638 --> 00:04:40,090 - methodist. - Ah. 35 00:04:40,217 --> 00:04:42,802 Well, I need a goodbye kiss or I'll feel 36 00:04:43,137 --> 00:04:45,930 cheap and used. 37 00:04:49,857 --> 00:04:51,453 Should we make another date now? 38 00:04:51,475 --> 00:04:52,353 I'll call you. 39 00:04:52,857 --> 00:04:54,521 Did my gun freak you out? 40 00:04:54,738 --> 00:04:55,522 Yes. 41 00:04:56,025 --> 00:04:57,692 The one in that dresser, right? 42 00:04:57,815 --> 00:04:58,440 Bye! 43 00:05:13,548 --> 00:05:15,622 I mean, look at this! 44 00:05:16,127 --> 00:05:17,831 We're never getting out of here. 45 00:05:18,007 --> 00:05:19,250 Can you tun on the radio? 46 00:05:19,297 --> 00:05:22,251 I have called the city council office over and over 47 00:05:22,385 --> 00:05:24,171 about putting in a light here. 48 00:05:24,425 --> 00:05:25,300 Radio? 49 00:05:25,846 --> 00:05:28,760 No, I can't have no waves right now. 50 00:05:28,847 --> 00:05:30,640 I'm too annoyed. 51 00:05:31,976 --> 00:05:33,142 What are you doing? 52 00:05:33,607 --> 00:05:35,682 - I'm hungry. - Please! 53 00:05:35,778 --> 00:05:37,532 Don't think I didn't see you eating and drinking 54 00:05:37,566 --> 00:05:40,100 every single sample in the store, Miss. 55 00:05:40,238 --> 00:05:43,572 Can't believe they didn't cut you off after the 7th Chai Latte 56 00:05:43,656 --> 00:05:46,362 - Those cups are tiny! - Yeah, unlike you. 57 00:05:46,997 --> 00:05:50,572 - Put the pretzels back! - No! 58 00:05:50,667 --> 00:05:51,823 - Give me the bag! - No! 59 00:05:51,956 --> 00:05:54,792 - I'm throwing them out! - No, you're not. Stop! 60 00:05:56,708 --> 00:05:58,002 Shit! 61 00:05:59,546 --> 00:06:00,832 Oh great! 62 00:06:01,178 --> 00:06:02,672 Just perfect. 63 00:06:09,637 --> 00:06:12,142 Shit! Goddamn it! 64 00:06:14,107 --> 00:06:17,523 Oh no! She be so angry! 65 00:06:17,647 --> 00:06:19,271 This is not your fault. 66 00:06:19,397 --> 00:06:21,372 Si, you tell the Mrs. this is your fault. 67 00:06:21,406 --> 00:06:23,022 No, it's not my fault either. 68 00:06:23,196 --> 00:06:24,861 Si, is your fault, please. 69 00:06:24,987 --> 00:06:28,001 You tell her or she make me sleep with the dog and the corn snake. 70 00:06:28,037 --> 00:06:31,610 There needs to be a traffic light right here. 71 00:06:31,707 --> 00:06:33,701 ...and she made me kill the rat! 72 00:06:33,837 --> 00:06:38,083 Doug Wilson and his merry band of idiots are just sitting up there and doing nothing. 73 00:06:38,126 --> 00:06:38,582 Asshole! 74 00:06:38,718 --> 00:06:39,832 She loves this car. 75 00:06:39,965 --> 00:06:42,221 Every month she pays more for this car than for me. 76 00:06:42,256 --> 00:06:43,593 And I have no license. 77 00:06:43,717 --> 00:06:46,213 You have no license? Oh, that's fabulous. 78 00:06:46,307 --> 00:06:48,153 Are you even legal? What's your name? 79 00:06:48,265 --> 00:06:52,092 Wait, wait, wait, let me get a pen. Stay right here. 80 00:06:52,265 --> 00:06:54,552 Who is your Mrs.? Your lady? 81 00:06:54,646 --> 00:06:56,393 - Mom! - One second! 82 00:06:56,518 --> 00:06:59,313 - What? no, mom! Mom! - God! One second! 83 00:07:00,028 --> 00:07:02,690 - Oh, shit! - Thank you! 84 00:07:07,737 --> 00:07:11,331 Did you realize if I married a non-jew, I couldn't go to a rabbinical school. 85 00:07:11,367 --> 00:07:13,512 I can go if I'm gay and my lover is jewish. 86 00:07:13,536 --> 00:07:14,741 I can go if I'm single. 87 00:07:14,996 --> 00:07:17,492 But I'm not eligible if I marry a beautiful shiksa 88 00:07:17,587 --> 00:07:22,670 with blond silky pubes waxed into the shape of a shamrock. 89 00:07:22,757 --> 00:07:24,582 Doesn't that seem fucked up to you? 90 00:07:24,716 --> 00:07:28,061 You know, I mean, more than half of all American jews marry outside the tribe. 91 00:07:28,097 --> 00:07:30,011 Clearly, there's a problem and yet 92 00:07:30,097 --> 00:07:33,933 when a jewish person is interested in pursuing his or her religious calling, 93 00:07:34,058 --> 00:07:37,061 if he or she fell in love with someone outside the faith, 94 00:07:37,228 --> 00:07:40,063 - and Lord knows, we don't always choose who to love - 95 00:07:40,236 --> 00:07:43,061 that jew is turned away. 96 00:07:43,777 --> 00:07:45,440 How was your sleepover? 97 00:07:45,526 --> 00:07:47,823 Yeah, how was your sleepover, Nancy? 98 00:07:47,945 --> 00:07:50,613 Let anyone know you were taking off for the night? 99 00:07:50,698 --> 00:07:51,740 Yes, I did. 100 00:07:52,116 --> 00:07:55,202 Andy and Lupita knew how to get in touch with me 101 00:07:55,326 --> 00:07:59,413 and I don't have to defend my actions to my teenage child. 102 00:07:59,545 --> 00:08:00,873 I got scared. 103 00:08:01,045 --> 00:08:03,412 - Oh, honey, you were asleep. - I woke up! 104 00:08:04,047 --> 00:08:07,751 Sweety, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you nervous, okay? 105 00:08:07,846 --> 00:08:09,752 I was just at a friend's house. 106 00:08:12,178 --> 00:08:14,383 The dishwasher's broken. 107 00:08:14,808 --> 00:08:16,473 L upita! 108 00:08:16,808 --> 00:08:20,451 Maybe if you'd spend a little more time around here, you might know that. 109 00:08:21,067 --> 00:08:22,893 Would you please do the dishes? 110 00:08:23,027 --> 00:08:24,691 The machine is broke. 111 00:08:24,946 --> 00:08:28,692 I know that, that's why I'd like you to do the dishes. 112 00:08:28,776 --> 00:08:29,522 N o. 113 00:08:29,905 --> 00:08:31,112 What do you mean "no"? 114 00:08:31,237 --> 00:08:32,443 Makes my hands crack. 115 00:08:32,537 --> 00:08:34,400 You need to get the machine fixed. 116 00:08:34,537 --> 00:08:36,433 Maybe I need to get a new housekeeper. 117 00:08:36,785 --> 00:08:39,990 Maybe you have too much love and trust for me 118 00:08:40,088 --> 00:08:41,910 to ever let me go. 119 00:08:47,337 --> 00:08:50,221 Call the repair guy and get him over here as soon as possible. 120 00:08:50,258 --> 00:08:51,091 O kay. 121 00:08:51,927 --> 00:08:54,303 So is this gonna be a regular thing with you? 122 00:08:54,478 --> 00:08:56,010 What is with your tone? 123 00:08:56,087 --> 00:08:57,013 Morning! 124 00:08:57,726 --> 00:08:59,800 She's not wearing any pants. 125 00:08:59,896 --> 00:09:01,681 That's okay, I'm almost a rabbi. 126 00:09:01,816 --> 00:09:04,320 Yeah, Shane is not and you're a lawsuit waiting to happen. 127 00:09:04,357 --> 00:09:06,140 Go upstairs, put some clothes on. 128 00:09:06,275 --> 00:09:07,563 Sorry. 129 00:09:08,818 --> 00:09:11,322 Lupita, would you get that please? 130 00:09:11,985 --> 00:09:14,361 I didn't say that Megan could sleep over. 131 00:09:14,498 --> 00:09:16,032 They didn't do much sleeping. 132 00:09:16,286 --> 00:09:18,363 - Excuse me? - Shut up, you spying perv! 133 00:09:18,455 --> 00:09:20,581 I was looking for mom, it was an accident. 134 00:09:20,786 --> 00:09:23,123 An amazing accident. 135 00:09:24,336 --> 00:09:25,910 I don't even wanna know. 136 00:09:26,047 --> 00:09:28,601 You didn't tell she couldn't sleepover. Come on, Nancy! 137 00:09:28,637 --> 00:09:30,253 Stop calling Nancy! 138 00:09:30,387 --> 00:09:31,883 My name is Mom 139 00:09:31,968 --> 00:09:33,421 or Mommy Dearest. 140 00:09:33,808 --> 00:09:39,931 For beautiful Nancy with the lon elegant... feet. 141 00:09:40,226 --> 00:09:42,390 Don't be afraid, Peter. 142 00:09:42,518 --> 00:09:44,182 - Ew! - Pete? 143 00:09:44,276 --> 00:09:46,102 Nice work, Mommy Dearest. 144 00:09:46,310 --> 00:09:48,567 Oh, dear God! 145 00:09:54,232 --> 00:09:57,112 Were you mean to your mother when you were a teenager? 146 00:09:57,656 --> 00:09:59,425 I didn't live with my mom, I lived with Heylia. 147 00:09:59,457 --> 00:10:01,463 And you don't pull that shit with Heylia. 148 00:10:01,495 --> 00:10:03,201 I want my kids to fear me. 149 00:10:03,337 --> 00:10:04,873 Do what my mom did. 150 00:10:05,295 --> 00:10:07,831 - Which was? - She shot me in the leg. 151 00:10:08,255 --> 00:10:09,791 Are you serious? 152 00:10:09,876 --> 00:10:12,722 She shot me in the leg and I am afraid of that woman now. 153 00:10:13,008 --> 00:10:14,343 Was she on drugs? 154 00:10:14,426 --> 00:10:16,352 My mom never did a drug a day in her life. 155 00:10:16,386 --> 00:10:18,552 My mom was... a drunk. 156 00:10:19,135 --> 00:10:21,551 One night she thought that I was my pops. 157 00:10:21,857 --> 00:10:24,001 That's how we got into the whole drug game. 158 00:10:24,106 --> 00:10:27,032 The painkillers I was getting from the doctors was making me sleep all the time 159 00:10:27,066 --> 00:10:30,510 so Heylia switch me to weeds, started meeting people in the industry. 160 00:10:30,526 --> 00:10:33,273 Before that she worked at Price Club. 161 00:10:33,778 --> 00:10:36,232 Hey, team! Solved all our problems yet? 162 00:10:37,118 --> 00:10:39,780 I might shoot Silas in the leg. 163 00:10:42,168 --> 00:10:44,622 Look, right now if we liquidated everything, 164 00:10:44,745 --> 00:10:46,801 got ourselves out of the lease, we're looking at maybe 165 00:10:46,836 --> 00:10:49,230 half of what we need to start growing marijuana. 166 00:10:51,465 --> 00:10:53,211 What about insurance? 167 00:10:54,887 --> 00:10:58,091 You got some kind of sneaky awesome plot behind them crazy eyes? 168 00:10:58,185 --> 00:10:59,092 Could we? 169 00:10:59,177 --> 00:11:00,812 Baby, that shit only works on The Sopranos 170 00:11:00,845 --> 00:11:04,481 and I will guarantee you that the fire chief is better at investigating arson 171 00:11:04,518 --> 00:11:05,760 and you are commiting it. 172 00:11:05,937 --> 00:11:08,471 You are a drug dealer. 173 00:11:09,645 --> 00:11:11,233 Not a fire bug. 174 00:11:11,357 --> 00:11:13,801 Why do you have to call Nancy "baby" and I don't? 175 00:11:13,818 --> 00:11:14,810 Black thing. 176 00:11:16,156 --> 00:11:16,980 Fine. 177 00:11:17,406 --> 00:11:19,692 Can I have your help here, please? 178 00:11:25,957 --> 00:11:27,993 A nyway... 179 00:11:28,706 --> 00:11:31,210 baby got some problems. 180 00:11:32,797 --> 00:11:36,963 Did I mention I slept with a DEA agent last night? 181 00:11:42,436 --> 00:11:43,930 I'm not going to jail for you. 182 00:11:43,936 --> 00:11:46,270 Fuck this! I'm out. You can kiss this nigger goodbye. 183 00:11:46,306 --> 00:11:49,601 No, my kid bit his kid's foot in karate. 184 00:11:49,685 --> 00:11:50,781 How could he plan that? 185 00:11:50,817 --> 00:11:53,653 It's just a totally fucked up random thing. 186 00:11:53,816 --> 00:11:56,701 He came right on and told me what he does for a living, he doesn't know. 187 00:11:56,738 --> 00:11:57,660 Fuck "he doesn't know"! 188 00:11:57,697 --> 00:11:59,702 And even if he doesn't, he will and me... 189 00:11:59,738 --> 00:12:00,821 I ma be gone. 190 00:12:00,946 --> 00:12:02,751 Do not come around Heylia's, do you hear me? 191 00:12:02,786 --> 00:12:06,080 You have stepped in shit and you ain't gonna track it to my house. 192 00:12:06,416 --> 00:12:08,210 Conrad, I won't talk to him anymore. 193 00:12:08,286 --> 00:12:09,703 It's late. 194 00:12:10,045 --> 00:12:11,291 Wait, wait. 195 00:12:12,875 --> 00:12:17,293 Are you angry 'cause I fucked a DEA agent or 'cause I fucked somebody else? 196 00:12:17,427 --> 00:12:18,633 Oh, wow! 197 00:12:18,847 --> 00:12:21,551 You think this is about arrogant ass? 198 00:12:21,848 --> 00:12:23,551 Let me tell you something... 199 00:12:23,727 --> 00:12:25,611 we wouldn't be having this conversation right now 200 00:12:25,646 --> 00:12:27,850 if you'd have fucked a travel agent. 201 00:12:29,728 --> 00:12:32,350 Get out of my way. 202 00:12:41,326 --> 00:12:42,863 I have asked in 203 00:12:42,998 --> 00:12:44,861 every way that I know how. 204 00:12:44,995 --> 00:12:47,782 You have repeatedly ignored my requests. 205 00:12:48,037 --> 00:12:52,413 But it does not change the fact that there needs to be a light 206 00:12:52,547 --> 00:12:54,372 at the intersection. 207 00:12:54,548 --> 00:12:57,500 It's a matter of public safety. 208 00:12:58,796 --> 00:12:59,790 What is? 209 00:13:00,218 --> 00:13:01,550 The light. 210 00:13:01,678 --> 00:13:03,172 Celia, lights cost money. 211 00:13:03,636 --> 00:13:06,053 Yes, isn't that what the budget is for, Doug? 212 00:13:06,185 --> 00:13:08,651 All of our money has been allocated for the year, we... 213 00:13:08,688 --> 00:13:11,191 we're renovating this chamber here. Haven't you seen the plans? 214 00:13:11,226 --> 00:13:14,153 I mean, come on! We got like a full kitchen going on back there. 215 00:13:14,187 --> 00:13:17,311 So I pay my taxes so you can have a kitchen? 216 00:13:17,405 --> 00:13:18,651 And a parade. 217 00:13:18,817 --> 00:13:20,911 And the balance of what we owe the branding firm 218 00:13:20,947 --> 00:13:25,151 for the new town slogan: "Agrestic, the best of the best-ic." Huh? 219 00:13:25,287 --> 00:13:27,461 And a lot of other stuff. A lot of other stuff too. 220 00:13:27,495 --> 00:13:30,591 Now, if that's everything, I wanna go home and watch the game. 221 00:13:30,746 --> 00:13:32,663 And drink a little bit. 222 00:13:32,748 --> 00:13:33,870 A djourned. 223 00:13:34,086 --> 00:13:36,372 Your turn to bring snacks next week. 224 00:13:36,467 --> 00:13:38,261 I think I speak for everyone when I say 225 00:13:38,297 --> 00:13:41,462 vegetarian pigs in blanket are bullshit. 226 00:13:42,257 --> 00:13:42,631 Okay. 227 00:13:45,135 --> 00:13:48,301 Oh! Celia. I'm sorry. 228 00:13:48,476 --> 00:13:50,822 Although I do think that counts as a touchdown. 229 00:13:58,198 --> 00:14:00,232 Want a shot of Jack in that? 230 00:14:02,528 --> 00:14:07,650 Great article about injecting human growth hormone to stay young. 231 00:14:07,788 --> 00:14:10,380 Except they never say where they're getting it from. 232 00:14:10,416 --> 00:14:12,423 Makes you wonder if they're sucking the youth 233 00:14:12,456 --> 00:14:15,080 out of small brown children somewhere so that actors 234 00:14:15,255 --> 00:14:17,581 and trophy wives can stay in business. 235 00:14:18,005 --> 00:14:21,212 I was serious about the shot. You want? 236 00:14:21,296 --> 00:14:23,040 Actually, I do. 237 00:14:23,176 --> 00:14:24,840 It's been one of those days. 238 00:14:24,928 --> 00:14:27,470 So, you heard about my accident? Right? 239 00:14:27,595 --> 00:14:32,301 And I just got humiliated at city council by the fuckhead Doug Wilson. 240 00:14:32,805 --> 00:14:35,310 - So what's up with you? - Just life. 241 00:14:35,568 --> 00:14:36,772 Kids. 242 00:14:37,355 --> 00:14:39,313 Baking. 243 00:14:39,566 --> 00:14:41,151 You need to get laid. 244 00:14:41,235 --> 00:14:42,563 Frankly, so do I. 245 00:14:42,776 --> 00:14:44,832 You're seeing anyone? Maybe we could share. 246 00:14:44,867 --> 00:14:47,361 You should run for city council. 247 00:14:47,498 --> 00:14:49,151 Doug would lose his mind. 248 00:14:49,246 --> 00:14:51,492 Oh, I didn't mean run for Doug's seat. 249 00:14:51,617 --> 00:14:53,951 Yeah, but Doug's seat is up this year. 250 00:14:54,037 --> 00:14:55,452 Maybe it's a bad idea. 251 00:14:55,587 --> 00:14:57,583 No, I think it's a perfectly great idea. 252 00:14:57,588 --> 00:15:00,582 Show that asshole that he can't treat people like shit 253 00:15:00,716 --> 00:15:03,591 and ignore their totally reasonable requests. 254 00:15:04,465 --> 00:15:06,050 I'm running for city council. 255 00:15:06,176 --> 00:15:09,631 Thank you, Nancy. I feel so much better now. 256 00:15:12,226 --> 00:15:14,972 So, basicly, my whole life has been leading up to this, 257 00:15:14,976 --> 00:15:19,852 to the rabbinat, you know. It's my true calling. 258 00:15:20,738 --> 00:15:23,692 And as far as the Hebrew goes, I'm a really quick study. 259 00:15:23,865 --> 00:15:25,612 I know all the brugatas already. 260 00:15:25,908 --> 00:15:29,901 And I know the word for jellyfish, it's medusot. 261 00:15:30,075 --> 00:15:32,782 And glida, that's ice cream 262 00:15:33,535 --> 00:15:36,411 Do you know what ... means? 263 00:15:36,588 --> 00:15:37,492 As in: 264 00:15:37,625 --> 00:15:40,372 I think you're full of shit. 265 00:15:40,586 --> 00:15:42,711 No, I don't think I know that one. 266 00:15:42,847 --> 00:15:45,710 Okay. So, this has been very amusing, 267 00:15:45,847 --> 00:15:48,543 I wish you all the best in your life and now I'm done. 268 00:15:48,637 --> 00:15:51,551 - Wait. What? I'm in? - You talk a lot. 269 00:15:51,636 --> 00:15:53,610 That's a wonderful quality in a rabbi, no? 270 00:15:53,648 --> 00:15:54,840 And yet you say nothing. 271 00:15:54,975 --> 00:15:58,930 Oh. Oh! Israeli snap! That's okay, I can take it. 272 00:15:59,068 --> 00:16:01,432 Resiliency is another excellent rabbinic trait. 273 00:16:01,568 --> 00:16:04,020 Time for you to go. Okay? 274 00:16:04,315 --> 00:16:05,731 Goodbye! 275 00:16:06,237 --> 00:16:08,362 Okay, good. Thanks for your time. 276 00:16:09,325 --> 00:16:13,111 I guess I'm gonna have to look for another rabbinical school. 277 00:16:13,408 --> 00:16:16,823 One that respects my ambition, one that recognizes my talent. 278 00:16:17,125 --> 00:16:20,412 Yes, our loss. Good luck to you! 279 00:16:22,507 --> 00:16:24,510 I'm begging you. This is the end of the road for me. 280 00:16:24,547 --> 00:16:27,500 Um... if you don't let me into your school, 281 00:16:27,635 --> 00:16:28,753 I'm gonna be killed. 282 00:16:28,885 --> 00:16:29,463 Really? 283 00:16:29,595 --> 00:16:33,420 Someone holding a gun to your head saying be a rabbi or die? 284 00:16:37,306 --> 00:16:39,060 Actually, yeah. 285 00:16:39,186 --> 00:16:43,023 You're my last chance, Yael Hoffman Director of Admissions. 286 00:16:44,487 --> 00:16:46,561 I beseech you! 287 00:16:47,407 --> 00:16:49,861 My life is in your hands. 288 00:16:50,486 --> 00:16:53,953 You have 5 minutes to explain yourself and no more bullshit. 289 00:16:54,116 --> 00:16:56,240 And I'm wearing a bra 290 00:16:56,366 --> 00:16:58,161 so stop looking for my nipples. 291 00:16:58,286 --> 00:17:01,333 - I... How'd you know? - 4 minutes 50 seconds. 292 00:17:01,457 --> 00:17:02,543 Okay. 293 00:17:07,756 --> 00:17:10,552 I didn't care what shit was going on. 294 00:17:10,757 --> 00:17:12,801 Every night we had family dinner. 295 00:17:12,925 --> 00:17:15,472 We were talking about our day, arguing 296 00:17:15,597 --> 00:17:17,062 or giving each other the stink eye. 297 00:17:17,098 --> 00:17:18,851 Whatever, we were all here. 298 00:17:18,936 --> 00:17:22,432 All sort of studies talk about how family dinner's like superglue. 299 00:17:22,647 --> 00:17:25,242 Hold you together and fixes everything that's broke. 300 00:17:25,277 --> 00:17:27,902 Yeah, higher test scores, less depression. 301 00:17:28,237 --> 00:17:29,732 You guys are better than NPR. 302 00:17:29,866 --> 00:17:31,731 Or we're the original NPR: 303 00:17:31,826 --> 00:17:33,232 Negros Preching Right. 304 00:17:34,038 --> 00:17:35,700 And if dinner don't work, 305 00:17:35,786 --> 00:17:37,951 you need to smack some sense into that boy. 306 00:17:38,076 --> 00:17:39,952 I'm not much for smacking. 307 00:17:40,127 --> 00:17:41,621 Just don't be his bitch. 308 00:17:41,787 --> 00:17:44,802 Now you pushed him out your hooch, you can puch him out your house. 309 00:17:44,837 --> 00:17:46,160 You the boss. 310 00:17:46,335 --> 00:17:49,543 Let's see. You want gruyere or smoked gouda? 311 00:17:49,676 --> 00:17:50,921 Smoked gouda. 312 00:17:51,297 --> 00:17:52,251 Here you go. 313 00:17:52,385 --> 00:17:54,383 So, uh, is Conrad around? 314 00:17:55,016 --> 00:17:56,972 Now you're about to lose your panini. 315 00:17:57,188 --> 00:17:58,931 You know you ain't friends no more. 316 00:17:58,976 --> 00:18:00,010 Them are rules. 317 00:18:00,145 --> 00:18:01,510 I just thought... 318 00:18:01,647 --> 00:18:03,150 He out buying me a breast pump. 319 00:18:03,186 --> 00:18:04,833 I hope he's getting you electric. 320 00:18:04,935 --> 00:18:06,390 Manual takes forever. 321 00:18:06,528 --> 00:18:08,323 Shit. Did we say electric or manual? 322 00:18:08,395 --> 00:18:09,813 We didn't say nothing. 323 00:18:09,988 --> 00:18:12,741 And don't think once you start pumping that I'm gonna sit up in this house 324 00:18:12,775 --> 00:18:14,911 while you're out there showing off your brand new titties. 325 00:18:14,947 --> 00:18:16,531 I've got a life too, you know. 326 00:18:18,786 --> 00:18:20,212 What the hell is she doing here? 327 00:18:20,246 --> 00:18:21,192 Is that the manual? 328 00:18:21,327 --> 00:18:23,540 You're gonna have to take that back. 329 00:18:23,665 --> 00:18:25,750 I need the... What do I need? 330 00:18:25,915 --> 00:18:27,002 The Pump In Style. 331 00:18:27,165 --> 00:18:29,540 Pump In Style. Electric. 332 00:18:29,837 --> 00:18:31,962 This looks delicious, Heylia. 333 00:18:32,217 --> 00:18:34,362 I'm gonna try the gruyere next time I come. 334 00:18:34,387 --> 00:18:35,780 Ain't gonna be no next time. 335 00:18:35,807 --> 00:18:38,270 Heylia, Conrad is talking to me and he's not supposed to. 336 00:18:38,307 --> 00:18:41,473 That's right. Boy, get your black ass back out to that store 337 00:18:41,555 --> 00:18:42,892 and get this girl the... 338 00:18:43,015 --> 00:18:43,813 Pump In Style. 339 00:18:43,935 --> 00:18:45,781 The Pump In Style and here take this. 340 00:18:53,948 --> 00:18:59,781 So what about "Celia Hodes... it's time for change." 341 00:18:59,868 --> 00:19:01,412 And then we show a big clock 342 00:19:01,536 --> 00:19:04,630 and, like, instead of numbers, they are nickels and dimes and quarters. 343 00:19:04,666 --> 00:19:07,121 Get it? Time for change. Isn't that cute? 344 00:19:07,206 --> 00:19:09,552 - Yeah, that's retarded. - That is not very nice. 345 00:19:09,587 --> 00:19:12,710 I have a nephew who's retarded and he has to wear a helmet. 346 00:19:12,797 --> 00:19:15,423 Where are the other girls? Didn't we say 4:30? 347 00:19:15,596 --> 00:19:18,061 - They're not coming, Celia. - What do you mean "they're not coming"? 348 00:19:18,097 --> 00:19:20,471 No, no, no, no. This is about Agrestic. 349 00:19:20,596 --> 00:19:23,303 I am so clearly more qualified than Doug Wilson. 350 00:19:23,437 --> 00:19:26,280 They all take stripper fitness class with Doug's wife Dana. 351 00:19:26,317 --> 00:19:28,431 It's a whole bonding thing. 352 00:19:28,566 --> 00:19:30,023 Stripper fitness class? 353 00:19:30,106 --> 00:19:31,492 Kenneth doesn't like me to do it 354 00:19:31,526 --> 00:19:34,833 'cause he thinks I'll go lesbo on him like when I took folk guitare. 355 00:19:34,868 --> 00:19:37,360 Hello, ladies. How's the election planning? 356 00:19:37,446 --> 00:19:39,571 Oh, fine. Trying to find a slogan. 357 00:19:39,695 --> 00:19:42,532 No, no, no. That's grownup juice, not for you. 358 00:19:42,828 --> 00:19:44,572 When can I have some grownup juice? 359 00:19:44,575 --> 00:19:46,951 When you have a daughter who drives you to it. 360 00:19:48,206 --> 00:19:49,003 Celia, 361 00:19:49,377 --> 00:19:50,883 just wanted to give you a heads-up that 362 00:19:50,918 --> 00:19:53,302 Doug knows you're running against him in the elction. 363 00:19:53,336 --> 00:19:54,381 And I care because? 364 00:19:54,506 --> 00:19:56,840 He seemed pretty upset. 365 00:19:57,008 --> 00:19:59,641 Especially when I told him I couldn't be his campaign manager. 366 00:19:59,676 --> 00:20:01,091 - Why not? - Why not what? 367 00:20:01,177 --> 00:20:02,980 Why can't you be his campaign manager? 368 00:20:03,018 --> 00:20:05,683 'Cause you're running. I... 369 00:20:07,318 --> 00:20:08,681 I just assumed that... 370 00:20:08,818 --> 00:20:10,433 Am I your campaign manager? 371 00:20:10,566 --> 00:20:11,140 No. 372 00:20:12,858 --> 00:20:14,351 How dare you? 373 00:20:14,488 --> 00:20:17,361 I run unopposed. This is my thing. Get your own thing. 374 00:20:17,446 --> 00:20:19,573 Well, I tried to get my own thing. 375 00:20:19,697 --> 00:20:21,692 A light at the mall in Hillgrik Road. 376 00:20:21,825 --> 00:20:24,070 But when that thing didn't work out, 377 00:20:24,205 --> 00:20:26,201 I switched to this thing. 378 00:20:26,377 --> 00:20:28,833 I'm hoping in the end to get both things. 379 00:20:28,917 --> 00:20:30,163 I'm city councilman Doug. 380 00:20:30,257 --> 00:20:32,291 Not after the next election you're not. 381 00:20:32,466 --> 00:20:35,710 So you're telling me, you don't want me to work on your campaign. 382 00:20:35,835 --> 00:20:37,343 I wanna win. 383 00:20:37,548 --> 00:20:38,552 Fuck you! 384 00:20:38,718 --> 00:20:40,963 Dean, there's a child present. 385 00:20:41,098 --> 00:20:43,512 Don't call me a child! I'm a civic leader. 386 00:20:43,636 --> 00:20:45,440 And you're not taking that away from me. 387 00:20:45,478 --> 00:20:46,893 She was talking about me. 388 00:20:47,017 --> 00:20:49,012 Doug, I am so on your side. 389 00:20:49,145 --> 00:20:50,273 Thank you, compadre. 390 00:20:50,357 --> 00:20:53,062 And I would be honored to be your campaign manager. 391 00:20:53,146 --> 00:20:54,523 We'll see. 392 00:20:54,647 --> 00:20:55,571 What do you mean "we'll see"? 393 00:20:55,606 --> 00:20:57,743 Do you two think you could take this little pussy party 394 00:20:57,775 --> 00:21:00,281 somewhere else 'cause we'retrying to work here. 395 00:21:00,405 --> 00:21:03,322 Dad can't say fuck but you can say pussy. 396 00:21:04,116 --> 00:21:05,993 I'll be in my room. 397 00:21:06,118 --> 00:21:07,243 Let's go. 398 00:21:07,457 --> 00:21:08,911 You will rue the day. 399 00:21:08,996 --> 00:21:11,291 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Rue my ass. 400 00:21:11,548 --> 00:21:13,623 - Not enough rue. - Come on! 401 00:21:13,756 --> 00:21:18,002 How about "Celia Hodes... making friends". 402 00:21:21,676 --> 00:21:22,883 What's up? 403 00:21:25,348 --> 00:21:27,090 Dinner in 10 minutes. 404 00:21:27,687 --> 00:21:30,390 I'm not hungry I just had Veggie Booty. 405 00:21:31,937 --> 00:21:33,830 Well, you're gonna sit with us anyway. 406 00:21:33,896 --> 00:21:35,852 Family dinner, so wash up. 407 00:21:41,075 --> 00:21:42,530 The repair guy didn't come. 408 00:21:42,656 --> 00:21:44,403 He was gonna come today. I was out. 409 00:21:44,407 --> 00:21:47,003 Lupita had a hair appointment so he'll be here tomorrow. 410 00:21:47,036 --> 00:21:49,660 - Hey, what's in the bag? - Family dinner. All of us. 411 00:21:49,826 --> 00:21:51,662 Yeah, I got work to do, Nanc'. 412 00:21:51,788 --> 00:21:53,542 Clear your crap of the table. 413 00:21:53,958 --> 00:21:56,081 Oh, I told Megan I'd eat at her place. 414 00:21:56,166 --> 00:21:58,251 Well, call and tell her not tonight. 415 00:21:58,757 --> 00:22:00,251 I made plans. 416 00:22:00,346 --> 00:22:02,272 Well, I bought chicken and you're my son 417 00:22:02,305 --> 00:22:04,733 and you're going to sit down and we're going to eat. 418 00:22:04,768 --> 00:22:05,923 So call her. 419 00:22:06,345 --> 00:22:07,513 Funny. 420 00:22:09,228 --> 00:22:11,390 - Take the phone. - Mom! 421 00:22:11,517 --> 00:22:13,180 We're gonna have a family dinner. 422 00:22:13,318 --> 00:22:14,743 You're a member of this family. 423 00:22:14,776 --> 00:22:19,271 Take the phone, call your girlfriend. Now. 424 00:22:22,868 --> 00:22:27,031 Get your ass in this chair before I kicked it to Tuesday. 425 00:22:27,115 --> 00:22:28,663 Andy, set the table. 426 00:22:28,787 --> 00:22:30,451 Game over, wash your hands. 427 00:22:30,538 --> 00:22:32,410 So help me God, I've had it! 428 00:22:32,498 --> 00:22:35,752 We're gonna be a family if I have to kill all of you. 429 00:22:35,837 --> 00:22:37,003 You hear me? 430 00:22:37,085 --> 00:22:38,331 Fine, I'll eat twice. 431 00:22:38,415 --> 00:22:40,502 Eat 7 times, I don't care! 432 00:22:40,588 --> 00:22:42,501 As long as you eat once with us. 433 00:22:42,927 --> 00:22:45,312 You're really invested in this chicken, aren't you? 434 00:22:45,345 --> 00:22:46,461 Shut up! 435 00:22:50,018 --> 00:22:54,261 See... nice... dinner. 436 00:22:54,567 --> 00:22:56,221 So... 437 00:22:56,777 --> 00:22:58,482 how was everyone's day? 438 00:22:58,858 --> 00:23:01,021 I got a B on my French test. 439 00:23:01,157 --> 00:23:02,650 Oh, très bien. 440 00:23:02,987 --> 00:23:04,071 Silas? 441 00:23:04,236 --> 00:23:05,320 I take Spanish. 442 00:23:05,487 --> 00:23:07,083 Did you get any test back today? 443 00:23:07,285 --> 00:23:08,192 No. 444 00:23:08,615 --> 00:23:13,073 I'm writing about what being a Jew means to me. 445 00:23:13,325 --> 00:23:16,910 If I write well, I'll be accepted into rabbinical school. 446 00:23:17,087 --> 00:23:19,003 And if I don't... 447 00:23:20,215 --> 00:23:21,923 I'll be shipped overseas to die. 448 00:23:22,086 --> 00:23:23,462 So far I've written 449 00:23:23,638 --> 00:23:28,091 "being a Jew means I have no foreskin and I may be a Taysachs carrier". 450 00:23:28,517 --> 00:23:32,261 So, uh, I think I'm gonna die. 451 00:23:32,397 --> 00:23:33,760 What's Taysachs? 452 00:23:33,895 --> 00:23:37,562 It's a fatal, genetic lipid storage disorder 453 00:23:37,688 --> 00:23:40,241 prevalent upon european Jews. You don't have to worry about it. 454 00:23:40,275 --> 00:23:41,950 If you had it, you'd already be dead. 455 00:23:41,988 --> 00:23:42,440 Cool. 456 00:23:42,526 --> 00:23:43,482 See... 457 00:23:43,986 --> 00:23:46,520 Look how we're learning new things. 458 00:23:49,656 --> 00:23:52,783 I'm not going to answer the phone during dinner. 459 00:23:54,747 --> 00:23:56,201 I mean it. 460 00:23:56,628 --> 00:23:59,303 Hello, you've reached the Botwins, we're not home right now. 461 00:23:59,337 --> 00:24:02,672 But if you leave us a message, we'll come home right away. 462 00:24:03,678 --> 00:24:06,423 Uh, Nancy, hi, it's Sanjay. 463 00:24:06,546 --> 00:24:08,773 I thought you might wanna know that the bakery... 464 00:24:08,808 --> 00:24:11,722 is on fire. Okay, bye. 465 00:24:17,356 --> 00:24:20,270 So, it looks like your employee was firing up an oven 466 00:24:20,395 --> 00:24:22,850 when his cigarette lit a gas line. 467 00:24:23,358 --> 00:24:26,313 Negligence and stupidity, pure and simple, ma'am. 468 00:24:27,655 --> 00:24:29,360 He could have been killed. 469 00:24:29,537 --> 00:24:30,940 I hope you're insured. 470 00:24:31,076 --> 00:24:34,451 Does insurance cover an employee's um... 471 00:24:34,956 --> 00:24:37,083 negligence and stupidity? 472 00:24:37,168 --> 00:24:39,122 You oughta check with your carrier. 473 00:24:53,556 --> 00:24:56,011 Something tells me you're covered. 474 00:24:59,188 --> 00:25:01,813 There's no business 475 00:25:02,026 --> 00:25:04,643 like grow business. 476 00:25:04,895 --> 00:25:06,653 There's no business 477 00:25:06,815 --> 00:25:08,230 I know. 478 00:25:12,516 --> 00:25:18,230 Transcript/Synchro: Travis www.forom.com 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net