Hey, what's going on?
I found a note on my door, ''Come to Monica's.
Bring champagne and a Three Musketeers bar.''
Yeah, I'II take that.
What's up?
-Monica and I are engaged. -Oh, my God.
CongratuIations. Where is she?
I'm engaged! I'm engaged!
She's been there for 20 minutes. You didn't hear?
I thought it was a kid yeIIing, ''I'm gay!''
No, that guy moved.
-Can I bring her in? -Let her stay. It's sweet.
I'm getting married! I'm gonna be a bride!
No, I wiII not shut up, because I'm engaged!
Oh, big taIk! Why don't you come here and say that to me?
My fiancé wiII kick your ass.
Come on, apartment 20, apartment 20.
You get her in, you boIt the door, I'II be in the cIoset.
The One with Monica's Thunder
Okay, wait, wait, wait.
I just want to say that I Iove you guys so, so much...
...and thank you for being here on my speciaI night.
Our speciaI night.
It just wouIdn't be my night-- Our night...
...if you weren't here to ceIebrate with me-- Us. Damn it!
It's okay, I want this to be your night too.
To Monica.
Come on, wait, stop it.
Okay, to Monica.
Have you decided on a band for the wedding? Because I'm kind of musicaI.
She got engaged a few hours ago, I doubt she's had time to think--
Speaking of chiming in, remember the time you burned down my apartment?
Yeah, you're on your own.
We shouId get dressed up and go have champagne at the PIaza.
I can't stay too Iong.
I gotta get up earIy for an audition. I gotta Iook good.
I'm supposed to be pIaying a 1 9-year-oId.
What?
So when you said get up earIy, did you mean 1 986?
You guys don't think I Iook 1 9?
Oh, 1 9! We thought you said 90.
Okay, everybody, Iet's go.
Is my candy bar around here?
No, you ate it aII.
I was afraid of that.
You know what shoes wouId Iook great with this ring?
Diamond shoes.
You're not getting dressed.
Know what I mean?
Yeah, but I don't think we have time.
There's gonna be a wedding.
You're gonna be the bride.
200 peopIe are gonna be Iooking at you in a cIean, white dress.
Let's do it.
So are you the fairest one of aII?
-I can stiII pIay 1 9, right? -Yeah, but you gotta dress younger.
If you wear the right cIothes, you can Iook any age.
-ReaIIy? -Yeah. I work in fashion...
...and fashion is aII about youth.
Fashion is about me?
About youth. Youth! Listen up, grandpa.
ChandIer, it happens to Iots of guys.
You're tired, you had a Iot of champagne.
Don't worry about it.
I'm not worried. I'm fascinated.
You know? It's Iike bioIogy.
Which is funny, because in high schooI I faiIed bioIogy...
...and tonight bioIogy faiIed me.
Check it out. I couId pIay this whiIe the guests are coming in. Okay.
Twelve years old and addicted to p[ork
No one thought Monica would marry
She knew her way Around a knife and a fork
Phoebe, that's great, but--
So you're not convinced. That's aII right because I got another one.
First time I met Chandler I thought he was gay
But here I am singing On his wedding day
Phoebe, no.
If you'd Iet me finish, it goes on to say that he's probabIy not gay.
You guys don't have this probIem, you're made of wood.
Hey, you Iook great.
Thanks.
You okay over there?
I don't know. You know? I feeI a IittIe....
You know what? Never mind. I'II be fine.
Don't worry about it. You're probabIy tired, you had a Iot of champagne.
It happens to everybody.
-Happy Monica's Night. -WeII, thank you. You too.
Can you beIieve they are actuaIIy getting married?
WeII, sure, but I get married aII the time.
-You okay? -Yeah, I guess.
Do you think we'II ever have that?
You mean ''we,'' you and me?
Oh, no, no, no.
''We,'' you with someone, me with someone.
Good, you scared me a minute.
I know. Shake it off.
It's just because you and I, we were Iike a nightmare.
-No, but there were some good times. -AbsoIuteIy. Like, there was....
-SureIy you can think of something. -Just give me a minute.
Oh, weII, yes.
I can think of one good thing.
You were aIways good at the...
...stuff.
I was good at the stuff?
I reaIIy Iiked your hands.
My hands?
Way to go, guys.
You were reaIIy good at the stuff too.
Oh, I know.
What are you thinking about?
Just some stuff.
Hey, you know what we never did?
Oh, no, not that.
We never had a bonus night.
-A what? -You know, a bonus night.
Two peopIe break up, but they get back together for one night.
One night, just sex? No strings attached?
-Yeah, yeah, we never had that. -No.
Okay, this is getting a IittIe crazy.
I'm sure it wouId be amazing...
...but I reaIIy don't think it wouId be a good idea.
I reaIIy...
...reaIIy...
...don't.
WeII, at Ieast I can stiII do some things.
'Sup?
'Sup, dude?
Take whatever you want, just don't hurt me.
You pIaying a IittIe PIayStation, huh?
That's whack.
PIayStation is whack.
'Sup with the whack PIayStation, 'sup?
Come on, am I 1 9 or what?
Yes, on a scaIe of one to ten, ten being the dumbest a person can Iook...
...you are definiteIy 1 9.
Come on, reaIIy. How oId?
Young. You're a man-chiId, okay?
Now get changed, everybody's ready. And pIease, pIease, keep my underwear.
Thanks.
You've had a Iot of sex, right?
When, today?
Some, not a Iot.
The reason I'm asking is because I had kind of a--
I was unabIe to--
I reaIIy wanted to, but I couIdn't--
I cannot beIieve I'm asking advice from somebody who's wearing that hat.
I had an incident.
Don't worry about that, man. That happens.
-It's happened to you? -Yeah, once.
-WeII, what'd you do? -I did it anyway.
Phoebe, come on, Iet's go.
Come on.
Why aren't you dressed yet?
I wrote the best song for your wedding.
Check this out.
If you get ready now, you can pIay.
-ReaIIy?! -Yes.
That's so exciting! Thanks, Mon.
But if you touch my guitar again, I'II have to pound on you a IittIe bit.
Fair enough. Get ready. I'II get everybody.
FinaIIy we can start ceIebrating my--
I'm sorry, apparentIy I opened the door to the past.
Okay, Monica, Mon. Okay, what you just saw--
Can I ask you just a IittIe question? Why tonight?
I waited my whoIe Iife to be engaged...
...and unIike some, I onIy pIan on doing this once.
Maybe it's seIfish, I'm sorry, but I hoped tonight couId just be about that.
But it is just about that.
Now it's about you getting back together.
See, you kind of stoIe my thunder.
We did not steaI your thunder. We are not getting back together.
Yeah, no, and you know what? Nobody even saw.
That's true.
-We just kissed. -It was just a kiss.
You guys kissed?!
What does this mean?!
Are you back together? Can I sing at your wedding?
Thunder being stoIen.
-Phoebe, it's nothing. -Let's not make a big deaI of this.
It was a one-time thing. It doesn't even matter.
Oh, my God.
I cannot beIieve you guys are taIking about this.
ProbIems in the bedroom are between a man and a woman.
AII right? Now, ChandIer is doing the best he can.
I don't think that's what they were taIking about.
No, but Iet's taIk about it.
What a great night. ChandIer can't do it, they kissed.
-What? -You guys kissed? This is huge.
No, it's not huge.
PeopIe thinking it's huge has Ied Monica to beIieve...
...we're steaIing her thunder, which we aren't.
We're stiII taIking about it.
That and ChandIer's probIem.
Monica, Iisten, Iisten.
WouId you feeI better if we stopped taIking about Ross and RacheI?
-That wouId be IoveIy. -You got it.
Now, I can pass for 1 9, right?
Yes, you can pass for 1 9.
-ReaIIy? -Yes.
-SeriousIy? -SeriousIy?
SeriousIy, no. Okay? You can pIay your own age, which is 31 .
I'm 30!
Joey, you are not. You're 31 .
Oh, crap!
So the PIaza. We'II get some mai tais? Maybe no more for you though.
You know, I think I don't feeI Iike going to the PIaza.
Monica, this is ridicuIous.
I don't want to taIk about it. I don't. EspeciaIIy with you.
That is whack.
I'II pIay it at the wedding.
We'II see if they actuaIIy Iet you pIay.
They teII you anything you want to hear...
...Iike, ''You Iook 1 9.''
Then they just take it away, Iike, ''No, you don't.''
Monica won't take this away.
-WouIdn't she? -WouId she?
WouId she?
It's starting to sound Iike ''wood cheese.''
Man, I couId go for some wood cheese right now.
Guess who.
Hey, I just reaIized we kind of Ieft some stuff up in the air.
What did Monica mean:
''I don't want to taIk,'' especiaIIy with me?
Why not especiaIIy you and me? We were both kissing.
StiII thinking about it?
I'm serious. What did she mean by that? ''EspeciaIIy you.''
-Who cares? -I care.
And so do I.
I have to taIk to her. WiII you Iet me get changed?
Am I going to Iet you watch me?
No.
I can't beIieve her. It's just so typicaI.
I know you're upset, but don't forget there is going to be a wedding.
You are going to throw the bouquet, and then a honeymoon.
-Maybe in Paris. -Paris?
We wiII take a moonIit waIk on the Rue de Ia bIah-bIah-bIah.
Keep taIking.
We wiII sprinkIe rose petaIs on the bed and make Iove...
...not just because it's romantic, but because I can.
I Iove you.
Don't say anything, you might scare it away.
It's Paris. Who knows we're here?
Hi, Pheebs. What's up?
You said I couId sing at your wedding, so I need a smaII deposit.
You know, some good-faith money to hoId the date.
We're not giving you a deposit for our wedding.
Oh, I see.
They break your heart, don't they?
You know, I don't reaIIy need their permission.
You want to sing at their wedding, sing at their wedding.
Yeah, and if you want to Iook 1 9, then you--
You got to do something about your eyes.
What's wrong with my eyes?
They give you away. There's too much wisdom in there.
Put some tea bags on them for 1 5 minutes.
-That'II get rid of my wisdom? -Maybe 1 0 minutes for you.
Give her the deposit, give her the ring. I don't care.
What did you mean when you said...
...you didn't want to taIk to anyone, especiaIIy me?
What a great apoIogy. And you accept. Bye-bye.
No, seriousIy, what was the ''especiaIIy me'' part about?
Let's just say it's not the first time you've stoIen my thunder.
Hey, here's a thought....
Monica, what are you taIking about?
My sweet 1 6. You went to third base with my cousin CharIie.
Third base.
It was aII everybody couId taIk about.
The onIy reason I did that was because your party was so boring.
We had a caricaturist.
Whenever I get married Guess who won't be asked to sing
Somebody named Geller And somebody else named Bing
Monica, your sweet 1 6 was Iike a miIIion years ago.
Yet here you are doing it again.
I don't want to steaI your stupid thunder.
Why eIse wouId you have made out with Ross?
Got me.
Easy, mimey, the moment has passed. It ain't gonna happen.
It'd be nice if I couId have this night.
I never wanted any part of your night.
No one was supposed to see us.
Is that why you did it in the secret haIIway, where nobody ever goes?
RacheI, I've been thinking.
I don't think us getting together tonight is such a good idea.
I'm caIIing it off.
Way to save your dignity, my man.
Mon, why, why wouId I ever want to take away from your night?
I don't know, maybe you feeI a IittIe resentfuI.
Maybe you thought you'd get married first.
Maybe you can't stand...
...that your formerIy fat friend is getting married before you.
Oh, wow, that-- You know what? That is so unfair.
Now I want to steaI your thunder.
Come on, Ross. Let's go have sex!
I can't beIieve you're gonna have sex on my engagement night.
WeII, somebody shouId.
Look, if we're gonna do this--
We're not. She's just gonna think we are.
I see, so everybody wins.
-Who is it? -It's Monica, open up.
Okay, Ross, stop it. PIease, wait a minute.
Yeah, you Iike that, baby?
May we heIp you?
I wanted to say I hope you have sex, and I hope you get back together.
I warn you, the night you announce your engagement...
...I'm going to announce that I'm pregnant.
How is that ever going to happen?
Do you want to know why I was with Ross tonight?
-I know why. -You don't.
-Okay, why? -Because I was sad.
What do you mean?
Look, I am so...
...so happy for you guys.
But you getting married reminds me of the fact that I'm not.
I'm not even cIose.
Maybe I just wanted to make myseIf feeI better.
I know that that's dumb, but you were so depressed...
...when Ross got married, you sIept with ChandIer.
I don't care, she sIept with me.
Anyway, sweetie, I am so sorry I ruined your night.
I'm sorry I aImost made you sIeep with Ross.
I'm gonna take off.
-CongratuIations, man. -Thanks.
And RacheI...
...what can I say?
You missed your chance.
From now on, the onIy person who's going to enjoy these bad boys is me.
We thought Phoebe would leave
But she just stayed and stayed
That's right, I'm here all night
And Chandler will never get--
Hey, here's a doIIar.
Consider it a deposit. PIease sing at our wedding.
Thank you.
Now who will p[erform the ceremony
Who will p[erform the cer--
I'II pound on him in the morning.
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